COURTNEY ROHAN YOGA

I am not the only one who knows about grief.  In 2021, we all do-- whether we admit it or not.  We know that it feels like our heart is sore right in our chest as it beats.  We know we want to hide and eat and scream and [fill in the blank with your thing ] till it stops.  Grief is like that.  We can not run from our grief.   The things we do to pacify ourselves don't really take it away.  Grief is a process that we must go through no matter the challenge it presents. We will go now to bear our cross, or we will go later kicking and screaming. Why, it is from within this space that new pathways are made, new ideas are birthed, new structures, atoms are split...evolution takes place.  And, it hurts. I can not lie to you. We will hurt.  But nothing is purified, transformed, even transmuted, without pressure.  And while we feel our grief, we must do just that.  Even if we have a friend to hold our hands, we will feel our grief with them there, but all alone. It will be nice to have a

What makes someone offer their time and attention to someone else? Do we feel love? Obligation? Both? Some would say: even an apology, meant for someone else's ears, in for the giver. To give means to receive. I believe this. This truth was made more clear a couple weeks ago when I went to go enjoy a massage from my favorite therapist at Osmosis Day Spa. The trip to this venue is long (though beautiful) and the treatment though always beneficial is expensive. I try to treat myself to this every so often as it is a healing modality that truly eases me on many levels.  This day, unbeknownst to me, I had received calls while I was teaching my Zoom classes. Osmosis had called. My appointment was cancelled! So, needless to say, after driving in traffic for over an hour to get to my appointment, I was disappointed when I reached the doors for this news.  Walking toward the door, I noticed a black woman putting on her shoes to leave. Since there are so few black woman in this area of Cali

Our lives are calling us to action, but we can not create lasting change without the feminine, nurturing aspects of ourselves. For too long we have overlooked the benefit of our feminine power. We have misunderstood its importance, its strength. So, I am spending time exploring the idea of softening. This idea is not for suckers, the way it was once imagined to be. When I was younger, if you were soft, people would walk all over you. Or so it seemed. However, what I have come to realize now is the illusion: Being soft is not for suckers. It takes real strength to live softly. The illusion to dispel is within the opposition: hard, cold.. so for this let's consider the word "fight." To shift our thinking about softening, we must reconsider what fighting looks like. When we are younger, fighting is physical. Then, we develop words, and fighting can become more involved. There comes a time when we all will fight in our truth and for our truth. But as we become more w

This Sunday, I attended two live stream church services. I went first to Pastor TD Jakes and then to Pastor Steven Furtick. I enjoy what they have to say, and most Sundays this is a part of my morning. I listen to many teachers throughout the week, but I like to hear the Bible on Sundays, and when the stories are taught well, that makes me happy. It fills my day and can carrying me well into the week. It makes me feel connected to Jesus. It makes me cry sometimes. Sometimes I sing, if I like the music, I pray, I lift my hands. I thank El Shaddai, the Almighty God, for and in, spirit and truth. That’s how I like to start my Sundays, now since I can not go to a building, which for years I have only done maybe every couple months. More recently I have enjoyed being in the chat rooms with people during the service. I like this chance to share and listen and hold space in a new way while being in my home, yet at church. I love when my son walks in and hears something that resonates wi

I spend a lot of time contemplating. I have always been a thinker. The people who know me best know that words have always been my outlet, words in song. Yes, I'll take that. (Ask my family, they'll tell you that I used to rap all the time. LOL.) No really, singing was my first love. But I was scared to sing in front of people, so I would sing when my dad would ask me to sing, when I was in the forest alone, or when I was at my high school performing arts school. Going to a performing arts school, led me eventually to share my poems. I had been writing poems since... hum, I can't remember. It has been a love affair, an act to share love, for myself and with others. When I started writing blogs some years ago, I realized that sharing my words in this format was helpful. I was not just writing in my journal, but sharing something that someone else could use. I love that about words. They can help. They can resurrect, and they can also do just the opposite. Hurtf

How interesting to find ourselves in this most precarious circumstance. I hope you are doing well with it all. I hope that if you found this website for the first time, it is because you are ready to do something special, irregardless of the things that look damning. Truth is, we are not damned. We are just getting started. I know that I am.  Our time is so precious. I feel that more and more each day.  Do you? Each moment that we say NO to is one more moment lost to possibility, to opportunity. I don't mean to suggest that you should say YES to everything, but I do suggest that you say YES to your life! Saying YES to your life means seeing that in each moment there is something you can do, even when the stakes are down. Saying YES means opening to seeing what can be good versus saying NO, which is defeated. From NO, the only option is NO.  So I am inviting you to say YES today to you, to growth, to the possibilities in this moment and the next. It won't hurt. Tr

In Uncertain Times, What is Certain? I have been asking myself this question again since this pandemic became a part of our lives: what is certain? I know what I know about uncertain times. I have had many in my 40 years. I have had to grieve the mortality of my mother, my aunt and best friend, and my grandmothers and grandfathers on both sides of my family. I have had to consider my own mortality on many occasions as I have been challenged with an incurable form of chronic cancer. I know my story is not special, necessarily. I know that many can say they have experienced worse. I share this story of mortality only to shine light on how in each experience this question of certainty emerged and emerges again for me. Considering what is certain is for me a rock in the mucky water of life and death. If we have not practiced feeling the intensities of life or had to feel them to the degree that we are feeling them right now, right now may be even more challenging. If you’ve numbe